Poorly

Apologies for my abscence, I was hospitalised with lungs that decided to have a holiday.
A week in hospital on Oxygen being pumped full of antibiotics it appears I am now allergic to and another week (and counting) at my Mothers and I'm about ready to be well now.
I was discharged with an epipen under strict instructions to jab myself with it should my throat swell and my lungs collapse. okie dokie. Meanwhile im full of Seratide and Steroids and havent been able to talk for a week. this is not fun. and neither was this . . . . . .

It will be-ee, It will be so nice

I've just booked a HOLIDAY, an actual out of the house ,the state, the country H O L I D A Y
whoopeeeeeeeeee.

I have decided that paying extra tax all year round is a much better way of saving than actually trying to put it somewhere myself where i cannot touch it.

So, the junior miss and I are off to New Zealand for three weeks in January Im so excited, I havent been there since I was 4 (thats 30 years ago folks and far out that makes me feel old.)

where was I , oh yeah, excited, and Im not often excited let me tell you. I havent been this chuffed about something since I purchased a sexy new graphics tablet for myself and that was yesterday so this week is a good one for the frivolous purchases / deserved rewards.

I have family in NZ so its not like totally uncharted territory but I promised the junior miss that I'd take her overseas before she turned 12 (and had to pay adult fare) Im cutting it a bit fine because she will have her birthday smack bang in the middle of the HOLIDAY but nevertheless If I do this for her as promised then the next holiday can involve me and beer and she can stay with Grandma.

New Hotness

I like Jake, Jake makes me laugh and Jake is hot, in a totally real person you'd like to get sweaty with and laugh with and fuck and eat doritos* in bed with kinda way.

Jake is also a leetle bit crayzee as am I, this is comforting makes me feel less alien, a little more stalker ... but less alien.

*insert food of choice here

click on Jake to go to Jakes blog.

Jake Jake Jakeity Jake

Almost one Semester down, 7 to go

Yippee, Ive got all assignments back and although I didnt do my usual "its crap" just to end up with a credit thing, I did in fact pass so I dont have to do anything over. hoo-fuckin-ray !!

I got my first distinction for a subject though, that looks interesting on my academic record full of F2's and W's,(unofficial v official withdrawals)It's amazing what a difference not being depressed and overwhelmed does to a transcript.

I havent yet failed anything that I have actually handed up, I take pride in that :) even if my record tells a different story.

My next challenge is to work out how to drop a web design subjext I want to do NOW into a teachign degree Im scheduled to complete in 2012.

Then its 8 weeks of maths !

eek.

Random Sunday FG Factage

1) I have a massive crush on David Walliams.

2) I dont "do" dusting.

3) I wish I was thinner but I am afraid I'd ahem "turn into" an uncontrollable sex monster if i was.

4) I dont really like chocolate, or icecream

5) I want to be Annie Liebowitz when I grow up.

6) I have three jobs and am studying teaching at uni (until I grow up)

7) I still miss my ex because when he wasnt being an asshole he loved me, and he was hot. and we had lots of sex. (he's been dead for three years.)

9) I dont like shopping much.

9) I'm posessed with a rapier wit that is not always used for evil

10) I dont like the beach.

Jeebus that was a bit depressing. I only wanted to talk about David Walliams really.

Hotness.























You may have seen him in another of his incarnations ..... I just wanna see him naked and up close. with noooooone else around. But Dave , hey if you are reading this I'd settle for a chat over a beverage.

pictures worth thousands of words

1) Flaming Goddess

2) Flaming Goddess (in Disguise)

Thanks To Jelly for the link to the Superhero Generator

I feel much better now.

and a little more motivated gym wise

a bit of wot I fink

I believe that due to the particular nature of this school it would be remiss of me not to give credit to the way the school as a community has evolved to respect and nurture the learners outcome as part of the bigger picture. While a strong emphasis on children possessing an innate significance as both individuals and part of a greater society may not be seen by some as “an example of teaching practice” it being put into practice to encourage students to perform at their best and become not only a successful learner but a successful member of the wider community provides an essential underpinning to the receptiveness of the student to positive learning outcomes.

all with a stupid laptop fingermouse and no *r* key. 500 words to go.

I am gonna get sooooooooooooooooooo drunk when I have my new birthday.

More assignments miss internet rubbish collector?

why is it that when what i really want to do is go to bed and sleep what im ACTUALLY doing is sitting up trawling the internet dredging up garbage of no consequence drinking copious amounts of coffee telling people that im "doing assignments" why dammit whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy cant i just fucking do them and go to bed. and sleep.

happy birthday to me

Hello,
Due to university committments and my inability to complete them in a timely fashion and organise anything remotely satisfactory of a birthday nature, I have postponed my birthday. Instead of today, Sunday June 19th, this year I will be celebrating it on Saturday July 2nd.
Thankyou for your attention
as you were.

my grain and whose fault it is

bloody headache. yuk. going back to bed. codeine and valium are my friends today.

fridays rock

went to a two day early intervention learning disabilities conference this week.

here are a few quotes, it might explain the migraine...

*coloured pens have a great time and a place*

*the cumulous amount of writing*

*the climate increased in the classroom*

*it's a real misnomier*

*when i blow on the kazoose you need to swap your papers*

*there is some tradeoffs*

*children are a behaviour problem in certain areas*

this was put on by TEACHERS for TEACHERS and school support officers (me) Jelly I feel we could talk.

the highlight of these two days were gathering these little snippets of teacher wisdom.

I am not a very tolerant person. The curse of intelligence. I want my crayon* back up the nose please.

now if youll excuse me im going to go and have a great time with some coloured pens in the climate filled room blowing on my kazoose all the while, this cumulous writing is rather draining. wishing you and your behaviour problems an enjoyable weekend.

/me out

*simpsons homer becomes inteligent then decides its too hard reference

If I thought anyone was reading I'd maybe post more

Hiya.

I've been a total slack arse lately with regared to this little piece of cyberspace.

I apologise.

Nothing much going on in this corner of the neighbourhood, I have had the flu which makes anythign even remotely linked to making sense and imparting valuable and/or witty and timely blog comment extra effort inducing.

I didn't manage to get any time off work though, without sick leave theres not a lot of point, still working three jobs but only have 2 assignments let for Uni, then a welcome mid year break where my free time becomes my own again and doing nothing will mean exactly that (as opposed to stressing about what I should be doing while not doing it.)

I tell a small lie regarding the status of my little corner. while I say " nothing much" is going on what I MEANT was that one of my friends has "bashed down the wall of friendship" (his words) and break my rather long peppered with totally random and unfulfilling sex drought. with some unexpected less random and somewhat more fulfilling sex. (yay)

yay! in that this is always a good thing but fuckin hell!. which is more often than not.

not.

I like this guy but I dont see any long term fulfilling sexual + romantic + friend combination happening. Mostly because he's a smoker a drinker (and by drinker i mean "forgetter") and I know this just dont work for me. On top of that he likes to tell you the same story 20+ times often in a row. and this drives me insane.

I also I felt more sparky mental stuff between me my friends Boss (attached) who I met for the second time last night at her work dinner he must be 60 but is totally hot in a totally on my wavelength sparkly eyed private joke shortish old warfie kinda way.

I love the sparky mental stuff.

so ...no miracles raining down upon me here. no quick fixes and no happy endings.not yet.

my friend who works at the dating agency is STILL sending me contact details for people.. i think I have a total of about 12 I need to call to avoid the "that chick was a total bitch" feedback but I really just. dont. want. to.

So in the meantime im just gonna sit and spark all by myself and wait till I find Mr sparky. The new clip by faithless & Estelle made me realise that I need the mutual sparky despite my pondering the ability to exist on um, no sparky.

Peace.

and I promise Ill do the at least once a week come and say hi thing.

FG.

more rubbish

You May Be a Bit Obsessive Compulsive ...

Meticulous and detailed oriented, you have some irrational obsessions. Maybe it's your super neat closet or washing your hands a gazillion times. You probably know it's weird, but you just can't stop thinking about it. In fact, the more you think about your quirks, the more you have to do them.

What Personality Disorder Are You?

Your Brain is 33.33% Female, 66.67% Male

You have a total boy brain Logical and detailed, you tend to look at the facts And while your emotions do sway you sometimes... You never like to get feelings too involved

What Gender Is Your Brain?

Your Linguistic Profile:

40% Yankee

35% General American English

20% Dixie

5% Upper Midwestern

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Your Japanese Name Is...

Michiko Minase

What's your Japanese Name?

Your Taste in Music:

80's Alternative: High Influence

80's Pop: Medium Influence

Adult Alternative: Medium Influence

90's Pop: Low Influence

90's Rock: Low Influence

Dance: Low Influence

Gangsta Rap: Low Influence

Old School Hip Hop: Low Influence

Punk: Low Influence

How's Your Taste in Music?

Sister Holy Spike of Warm Reason says

dont stay up playing with name generators when you have assignments to do.

there is always a slim chance that you could end up pondering the idea that you may actually enjoy yourself just that little bit more if you were actually a cereal named Chewy Berrylicious Loops. I know I am.

Yours Sporadically,
Bessie Jean McCoy
(call me Jenny).

Seeya Paul, again.

Hi again,
far out I have been pretty (s)lackadaisical with my postings but I'm back now.
Finally moved house (yes I now it took 6 weeks) and we are settling in pretty well, It took me ages to finally sever ties withthe last place because while working three part time jobs and starting Uni may come easily to some, that fact that I tried to combine them with moving house kinda spazzed me out a bit. Anyway on to todays blog entry,

As most of you reading this would know another Paul has left us. I say another because my Paul, my ex-boyfriend and close friend was killed crossing the road three years ago, thats a whole other blog in itself and I'm almost able to live with that now but another one has gone, Paul Hester from Crowded House hung himself in a park last weekend.

While this shocked me and made me kinda melancholy over the last week it didnt really affect me until I was listening to the tribute on JJJ last night and promptly proceeded to bawl my eyes out. After wondering what happened I put a bit of thought into it and came up with the following that I posted on to the FRENZ forum this morning that sums up how I feel about it.

begins->

Hi All, I had to wait for my login to be approved heres my post from yesterday during the jjj tribute . . .

Although I have been reading the forums every day since I heard about Pauls death I didnt think I "deserved" a post of my own here.

I dont have all the albums, Id never been to a concert, I didnt know Paul or any of crowded house personally and i never bought the t-shirt.

Its a bloody hot day here in Adelaide today and after going out this afternoon i had a nap on the couch while I was waiting for the jjj tribute to start. I woke up mid "It's only natural" at about 5.16 and I just started crying It's been 5 songs ...and I'm still crying and it's turned up and yeh those drums sound louder than ever.

After trying to work out why I have been so upset, not being a "real" fan I have realised that It's not about buying the albums or the t-shirts or any of that , its about the fact that I know all of the words, and the fact that they remind me of times, and moments and decades, they are part of me, my exposure to Crowded house has made me MORE me. A previous poster hit the nail on the head when they said it was about being the soundtrack to our Lives....

My first and only crowded house album was purchased when I still got pocket money, and its vinyl and it was $14, and I still have it.

While I had never bought a ticket to a concert I HAD seen Crowded House live, Once at the Grand Prix in Adelaide about a hundred years ago (1987 I was 16).I waded through waist deep,muddy, beer filled,putrid lake water to get to the front of the stage and had a bloody WONDERFUL time, I gashed my foot on some broken glass at the bottom but I didnt care, It was a totally unique and fantastic experience,

I also saw (heard) them again at WOMAD where all I can remember is the chorus from "italian plastic" which I had never heard before or since but it has stuck with me ever since (since i was about three i have always taken a glass of water to bed with me and I remember thinking how nice it would be to have someone that wanted to be my glass of water. silly thought, silly song It doesn't suprise me that Paul wrote it, it just makes it more special)

I am really going to miss the magic that was/is Paul, so many people loved this man and just like me havent realised until now, while I also shed a few tears when I watched the final CH concert on the steps of the Opera House they were nothing like the raw emotion that was tapped today when I really realised it was over, That Paul is gone and everythign is different.

I have told people that Paul has died and they say "oh I heard that" but they dont GET it. I've stopped telling people.

It is so hard to deal with this. I can only Imagine what this time must be like for Paul's close family the people that knew and loved him and I want to take the chance to offer my love to them and acknowledgement of what a wonderful effect Paul has had on my life and to thank them all for sharing him with me.

Wherever you are Paul I hope its better for you because where you have been has made it better for me.

thankyou for giving me somewhere to express my shared grief and offer my thanks

...a friend committed suicide
I could not escape, a plea from the heart
you know what it means to me

->ends

oh yeah,

and the Pope died, he sounds like he was an Interesting guy before he went all papal and I might do a bit of a Bio read but Im not gonna cry about that.

and uhh, if Steve, the guy who gave me and my gashed foot a lift home from the concert in the mud is reading this, I just want to say that I thought you were pretty cute but my "does this guy like me" radar was totally fucked (now its just pretty fucked) you were also 24 and that freaked me out a bit. in retrospect I wish i'd got your number.

Carpe Diem, seize the fuckin day people cos tomorrow it may be seized from you

and if anyone works out how to do this day seizing when you feel like shit please let me know

FG

Sun.Star Zamboanga - Bizarre baby story

what the ?

the uh, "english" in this amused me.

Sun.Star Zamboanga - Bizarre baby born with extra body parts dies

30 things you didnt know about me yesterday

Hello again .

This was just sent to me so i've filled it on for you all because i know all two of you cant get enough information on my bathroom setup.

Loving this not having to think of stuff to post thing.

if you feel so inclined you can post your own versions.

thst'd be fab.

cheers

me



1. WHAT TIME DO YOU GET UP?
when /if I have to.

2. IF YOU COULD EAT LUNCH WITH ONE PERSON, WHO WOULD IT BE?
Ewan McGregor

3. GOLD OR SILVER?
Silver

4. WHAT IS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW AT A THEATER?
Spongebob Squarepants - The Movie

5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW?
Six Feet Under

6. WHAT DO YOU HAVE FOR BREAKFAST?
Toast / leftovers depending on what time i get up

7. WITH WHOM WOULD YOU HATE TO BE STUCK IN A ROOM WITH?
Most People

8. WHAT/WHOM INSPIRES YOU?
nature, triumph over adversity, people that get up early

9. WHAT IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME?
Jacqueline

10. BEACH, CITY, OR COUNTRY?
City

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Boysenberry Ripple

13. FAVORITE COLOR?
Dark Purpley Blue

14. WHAT KIND OF CAR DO YOU DRIVE?
a small shitty one

16. FAVORITE FLOWER?
Freesia / frangipani cant choose.

17. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD ON VACATION, WHERE WOULD YOU GO?
Everywhere

18. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHROOM?
white with grossly multicoloured tiles that will soon be lilac

19. WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE GROWING UP?
Photographer

20. WHERE WOULD YOU RETIRE TO?
hopefully somewhere I could feed myself.

21. FAVORITE DAY OF THE WEEK?
Every day and no day

22. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?
not a fucking thing

23. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Adelaide

24. WHAT IS YOU FAVORITE SPORT?
dont have one

25. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?
salt and pepper squid

26. PERSON YOU EXPECT TO SEND IT BACK FIRST?
well im not sending it to anyone so no one

27. WHAT FABRIC DETERGENT DO YOU USE?
the one in the blue box.

28. COKE OR PEPSI?
Dr Pepper

29. ARE YOU A MORNING PERSON OR A NIGHT OWL?
night owl.

30. WHAT IS YOUR SHOE SIZE?
8

when do get my maturity ?

response to Knifey's post that was so long winded I decided to use it here today. hurrah.

Yes,

I too am often amazed at the fact that, at nearly 34, I haven’t got my "adult brain" yet; I seriously thought that something was supposed to happen between 18 and now to make me grow up but nope.

I can sense subtle differences within myself eg the way I deal with people, the way I feel about myself, the amount of weight i've put on :( but if I had to chose any one single defining moment I couldn’t.

I had a child at 22, by myself and I’ve pretty much been that way since, due mostly to the fact that a) I won't settle for just anyone and b) I spend a lot of time in the house being mumsy (on the net)which makes it hard to meet anyone at all let alone someone to settle for. Somehow I still manage to have enough interest generated so that I have at least four people that I could ring (but wont) for a booty call

I don’t smoke, don’t play sport and I don’t like hanging around pubs or people in general for that matter)

in a vain attempt (bootless errand, fool's errand, lost cause, merry chase, red herring, snipe hunt, wasted effort, wasted labour, waste of time) to connect with people outside of the home I registered on some online dating sites.

Fuck what a bad idea

I literally ended up writing such alluring statements on my profile as *I don’t like the beach* and *if one more moron sends me a message I am going to scream* still they thought I was joking.

I DONT WANT A BORING BITTER DIVORCED SOMEONES EX-HUSBAND I AM NOT AN EX-WIFE AND I DONT WANT TO "SETTLE DOWN" I JUST WANT SOME COMPANY ON MY JOURNEY IS THERE NO ONE OUT THERE THAT GETS THAT ??

Ahem.

I too look young for my age (some one thought I was 18 last year but I think she left her glasses at home) most people think my daughter is my sister. I don’t FEEL any different on the inside; just a little ripped off that my outside betrays this.

I am facing the prospect that I am going to be alone forever with no one to rub my neck and wash the dishes or provide sex on tap but still it doesn’t bother me as much as thinking that I am alone mentally, that there really isn’t anyone out there that just understands me, sometimes I feel like I live on planet stepford.

Anyhow this is why I am having a great time in blogland. I'm realising that I’m not quite as alone as I thought I was (mentally).

Geez Knifey sorry to rant/hijack I’ll shut up now. And go and post this on my blog cos it’s the most I’ve written in ages.

fg
xx

pack up your troubles

Another day where i wish i could blog from the couch via telepathic means.
Moving is going really slowly. I have taken one box of things to the new house, I went around and took everythign off the walls, put it all in a box and moved them to the corner of a room at the new house, yup, one box, of stuff that was on the walls.

The rest of my stuff is still currently stuffing things, drawers, shelves, cupboards you name it. My stuff is very stuffy in its stuffiness and did I mention I have a LOT of stuff.

What I really wish I could do is move house and go to work from the couch.... telepathically.

I have a few plans as to how I can undertake this massive shifting of stuff real plans, like actual drawings, and lists. Yes I said LISTS ! that, my friends is how much I wish I could do it via remote control Im DRAWING when I could , you know, actually pick somethign up and put it in a fucking box.

The security screens should be on in the next week and a half and Im probably going to be kicked out of here in the next two so things will happen. just not overnight. or the next night, or the night after that.

I do apologise that my entries aren't nearly as witty and insightful as they could/should be workin on that. I'll put it on the list.

put stuff in a box, write witty blog.

out.

fg

fruity lexicon

Bienvenudo mi casa su casa ( and I totally don't know if that's one or two languages there, if any)
Firstly I apologise, unfortunately all the amazing blogposts I have had in my head the past few days were just that.
it takes a certain dedication to update regularly, especially when I am spending upwards of two to three hours a day reading everyone else's posts (in their historical entirety).

The good (?) news is that as a result of living vicariously through other peoples lives (or just taking comfort that I'm not the only person sitting at home attached to a keyboard of an evening) I have left a few comments, got myself out there on the cyberspace dancefloor and sidled up to the cute guy I cant bring myself to look at but if I stand here and jiggle a bit he might not RUN away so I get to stand next to him for a bit and pretend I don't have to get off my ass and hit a real dancefloor/guy/gym which will have to fucken do for now.

uhh where was I ?

yeh.

In English (sort of) I have been taking babysteps in cyber-land* and actually bandying about my name and address so it seems some have come looking for me. And now I have performance anxiety but you know what ? fuck it. I haven't written for ages and I need to. And doing it on paper when I just KNOW there's no one to say "I understand you" just doesn't cut it.

I'm happy to have visitors, better than feeling like I'm talking to myself I hope that I too can become a blog that you need to check up on, even if its just to be reassured that yep, its the weekend and I'm still here.

Meanwhile my keyboard is being a spastic Mo-Fo and not following instructions, every now and then it decides it wants to YELL and no amount of caps lock bashing will undo it until it feels good and ready to be undone. This makes posting kinda more trouble than I have been willing to get into of late but I aim to rectify this in the near future, there were a few half posts that had me SHOUTING ABOUT NOT GETTING ANY SEX that didn't seem important enough at the time to go back and tone down so they got deleted. don't worry , there will be plenty more of those I'm sure.

I cant remember what else I was posting about, probably I have no life, my daughter gets up my nose with the pre-teen not listening thing, I am facing the reality that I have to move within a week and have to renovate the bathroom today in order to do so and I haven't been to bed from yesterday kinda stuff. whoo hoo.
just you know. stuff.

Love youse all.*

The Flaming Me.

*What Kind of spellchecker tries to replace cyber-land with gibberlins ?? jeez and uh, it didnt recognise the word blog, or fuck for that matter, I will have to attend to this.

**Unless you're a nazi cunt that found me from Darp's blog. If so you can fuck off.

when life gets in the way

Howdy,
got into Uni, freaking out man, start next week. new house is ready - ish except the floor polisher bastards did a shit job and have to fix bits.went to the big day out after party and got grumpy with my friend for leaving me there after taking some 18 year old home, promptly paid her back by drinking copious amounts of (more) beer and taking TWO guys home, ok well I didnt bring them home and one of them was a knob and it would have been a good idea if id managed to just stick with the one but feh, missing real proper sensible male adult company and yes sex, i am missing the sex, maybe losing one of my jobs, got a phone call tonight about gaining another, still have to actually move house, still babysitting the chinese boy (who should know better the little shit who goes out to buy a phonecard and isnt back 9 hours later) Friend of mines son was killed on his bike last night, rest easy and I hope Dougie wherever you are that its better.
Life goes on, or it doesnt. I aim to be more vigilant in the near future just let me get through the next couple of weeks.
Love
FG